The Santa Card

There's been lots of talk over the years about people using the "race card" , and now I'd like to add the "Santa Card" to the mix.
You see, the Santa Card is powerful. And if you use it wisely you will reap many rewards. Don't know how to use the Santa Card? Well, follow these simple steps and you, too, will be on your way to fame and fortune ( well, probably not. But you just might win a fight with a 3 year old).

Situation #1:
Your child finds that bedtime is a nuisance. You see bedtime as your escape from the looney bin that has become your life. How do you play the Santa Card at bedtime?
" Faith, lay down right now or Santa will NOT be bringing you any presents this year!"
and magically the child will lay down, close their eyes and with an angelic look to their face say, " yes, Mother, I will gladly go to sleep." ( just kidding, in reality the child screams, "But I NEEEEEED presents!"

Situation #2:
Your child decided that yogurt tastes much better if it is licked off the floor rather than spooning it out of a bowl. How do you play the Santa Card at meals?
"Faith, if you don't stop making such a big mess with your yogurt I'm calling Santa Claus and telling him you're being a naughty girl!", and magically the child will get a wet cloth and lovingly wipe the yogurt up off the floor ( just kidding, in reality the child will announce that she's not hungry anymore, then get up and walk through the yogurt and leave yogurt footprints in your kitchen)

Situation #3
Your child has figured out that back-talking her mommy makes mommy breathe really loudly and count from 10 backwards. How to use the Santa Card when your child gets sassy? " Faith, if you backtalk me one more time I'm going to write Santa a letter and tell him to put you on the naughty list", ( again, kidding, because in real life when you point out that your child is being sassy, their comeback will be an eye-roll and a "whatever" and then they'll run really fast down the hall because they know you're right behind trying to swat their butt)


So yeah, I have been pulling the Santa Card lately. Faith has figured out that Santa is the guy that stuffs presents under the tree. I figure that if I can get her just scared enough of the possibility that Santa will drive right past our house then maybe she'll turn her naughty girl attitude into a sweet angelic angel. So far it's working 50% of the time, other times she will just tell me not to call Santa. I'm not sure if putting a big fat guy I've never met in charge of disciplining my daughter is a good idea or not, but if it works than I'm all for it.

Do you think one day she'll kill me for making her wear this?

I can't help myself, I love doing craft projects with the kids. Most of the time they're pretty fun, but I think I may have gone too far with this one. Making a hat from a paper bowl sounded good at the time, but now I'm pretty sure that it wasn't. I thought 3 year old kids weren't old enough to feel shame or embarassment, but now I'm not so sure. Faith looks like she wants to escape, and fast. She has that "I'm only wearing this to make my nutjob of a mother happy" look to her face. Truth be told, she never wore it again after that. Later on she used to it smack the cat. I'm pretty sure even the cat thought it was ugly.

Yep, that's my girl

Walking around with bed-head hair, with her shirt on backwards, and chillin' in her momma's heals . There's no better way to describe my Faith, she's definitely one of a kind.

Ok, seriously...

Why are the stores filled with Xmas decorations already? It's not even halloween yet! Geesh!! Maybe Travis should just fill my xmas stocking with Valentine's Candy and kill two birds with one stone.

Grandma's birthday party

My mom turned 21 again ( or as she put it, " I'm 21 almost 3 times over!), actually she's 50-something. We went to her house for cake and a BBQ, and later took the kids to the park to play. It was a fun day. I really enjoy getting all the cousins together in one spot, they play so well together. Happy Birthday, Momma!

My arch enemy

This nasty creature is the caterpillar that seeks to destroy my tomato plant. I have to go out there every few days to look over all 7 plants to either pick off the bugs or pick off the eggs. They are NASTY, and that little stinger on it's butt will stick you if you get too close. It's not a nice bug, oh no, it's a mean ol' bug. And if you bother it enough it will leak this nasty flourescent green goo from it's head and it's butt. Talk about gross!!! And the fact that it looks like it has eyeballs all over it's body makes it even grosser ( is grosser a word?). But of course on the day I found this big, juicy guy Faith saw it and said, "oh hi Mr. Caterpillar, let me pet you." And so I realized that I couldn't throw someone names Mr. Caterpillar in the garbage. He now rests nicely in his pickle jar condo, and if we have any luck he will build himself a cocoon and turn into the nasty brown moth that he's destined to be. You know that book, THE VERY HUNGRY CATERPILLAR? Well, this guy isn't the cute, rainbow colored bug like in that book, this is more like the VERY HUNGRY AND UGLY CATERPILLAR THAT LEAKS GREEN GOO. Now maybe I should write a book about that! Blech!

She's seriously the cutest fairy ever

I don't think there has ever been a more beautiful fairy than my Faith. I admit, I am a bit biased since she's my daughter, but there's no denying that this little girl has got the looks of an angel.

I curled her hair and put some of my makeup on her ( don't even ask me why I have blue eyeshadow in my makeup drawer!) and she just turned into the most beautiful little fairy. I couldn't help but take a gazillion pictures of her, but as to not bore you I am only posting a few.